"I attended the pain management in-patient programme back in October 2019. I suffer from severe sacral nerve damage, Fibromyalgia and CFS. After years of back and forths with doctors/hospitals/physiotherapists, I’ll admit that I hadn’t started off hopeful, but I was desperate. When I attended the programme, I had been bedbound from 2015-2017 and then housebound after that. I very, very rarely left the house. To say that I lacked a quality of life would be an understatement. I also had a lot of unaddressed trauma that I’d been unable to get any support for. I had a bucket load of work to do, both physically and mentally and getting started on that journey was hard. Probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do… but infinitely worth it.

During that month I was able to make more progress than I had in years and the entire team at Bath were an absolute anchor after I’d been drifting out to sea and drowning for so long. Not only were they able to help with low-impact physio, medication and understanding chronic pain, but the psychological support was invaluable. The psychologists were the first to recognise that I needed PTSD therapy and after the support they offered during the programme, I made sure that was one of the first things I did upon arriving home. That therapy has really helped my overall healing and progress and after years of drowning, I finally felt seen.

The work didn’t stop once I left Bath. I stuck to the programme. I saw in just that month, the progress I’d made. I saw the difference it could continue to make. Being away from the group of friends I’d made whilst at Bath was really hard, especially because the pandemic hit not long after and isolated everyone. But our group have remained in touch and continue the support network that we formed whilst there. Being thrown back into the ‘real world’ after a month in Bath was something we all struggled with, but I continued the hard graft.

At first, I recognised little changes, and then those little changes became big changes. Then they were huge.

Following the programme, I continued to do the daily physio and began to introduce more daily activities. At first it was just little things like making the bed and washing up, then it became bigger things like gardening. At first, I used my wheelchair but then used both crutches, to one, and then no mobility aids. It was slow going and some days were harder than others but one thing we’d been taught in the programme lives inside my head, constantly reminding me ‘progress isn’t always linear.’

During the programme we learned a lot about adaptation and how to be able to do the things we’d all be unable to do for so long in a safe and paced manner. In 2020 I grew a lot of veg and was able to craft a lot of things for our wedding that got postponed due to the pandemic. I also returned to my studies with the Open University, which was another thing I had felt disappointed at having to discontinue. I now only have two modules to go before I receive my degree.

During the programme at Bath, the team encouraged us to make realistic goals. My main goal was to walk down the aisle without any mobility aids (no small feat after being in a wheelchair for so long.) In August 2021 I completed that goal and I cannot thank them enough for that. Not only was our wedding day amazing, but it meant so much more to my husband and I, that I had worked so hard to achieve that goal. In late 2019 into 2022, I was also able to return to social hobbies that I’d long since written off as impossible but always gained a lot of self-worth from.

One of the hardest things to discuss in the programme was the dreams and ambitions I had needed to give up because of my disability. I believe it wasn't until week three that I discussed how hard it was that I felt I couldn't become a mum. The team pushed back on that and encouraged me to continue the work to make that dream come true. On the 12th June 2023, I accomplished that dream.

I don’t have the words to express the gratitude I have to the entire team at Bath for all they have done for me and my family and the magnitude of it is not lost on us. If I hadn't attended the programme and received the help and support from them, quite honestly, my daughter would not be here now. They gave me back my dreams, my life and quite honestly… me. The me that I’d lost to my disability was reborn and has thrived in a way I hadn’t been able to, ever. They gave my husband back our dreams. They helped me become a mum, and there are no words to express how much that means to me and my family.

Although I still have bad days, my good days now tend to outnumber them. I am able to recognise when I'm booming and busting, and using mindfulness check-ins more consciously has really improved my quality of life. I was able to come off of all but one medication for pregnancy, and with the help of my specialist team in London (St Thomas' and Guys'), I made it through relatively well. The shift to being a mum is certainly a new dynamic that I am still learning to balance, and that can be really tough, but I am enjoying every moment, even the hardest."